More!

More depression!  My days are undulating and I don't like it.  I have another counseling appointment on Monday so I'm looking forward to that.

I want to remember what love feels like.  I want to remember what affection and compassion feel like.  Honestly, I can't remember.  I simply don't care about anything and I really haven't for almost 2 years now.  I would say that it hurts to be like this but I wouldn't know what to compare that feeling to.  I'm just unsettled.  Listless.  Apathetic.  Lethargic.  Reclusive.  Fake.  Bland.